So Brian hurt Mikey for his own good. We get that; we do. But now Brian is hurting as well, as evidenced by his calling Michael as Michael is packing up to move in with David. He doesn’t say anything, but Mikey knows that it is Brian because of his funny breathing due to his deviated septum. Emmett says to forget the asshole. He has more important things to think about, like living with David. And for the first time we hear yet another one of the many mantras of Brian Kinney. He doesn’t “do” love, now he doesn’t “do” apologies. Too bad he doesn’t also not “do” screwing people over. Oh, well. Mikcy says that Em is lucky now, because he will have the apartment all to himself, and he can bring home all the tricks he wants. I love how Emmett is just as big of a slut as Brian is. Maybe that’s why Brian is fond of him. Only Emmett isn’t so sure that will be happening. Oh, no. Not the Emmett Goes Straight sub plot from last ep, please! I like my Emmett with his flame burning bright.
At Ryder, Brian has a bitch of a headache; probably from all that drinking and staring forlornly at the giant pics of your best friend hanging on your wall. Or all the comic book reading that he’s suddenly taken up. Huh. According to Cynthia, it has been a week since the party of deem and Brian’s push off of Mt. Kinney. And Michael calls every five minutes? Holee shit, man. Give the man some room to breathe, here. Brian isn’t feeling that way at the moment, though. He’d love for his Mikey-poo to give him just one phone call. And the sad part of it is that this is truth-speak.
What do you do when you’re best friend’s bus-ted? Dial 1-800-B-F-F-Replacement! Teddy will be more than glad to assist you in getting over this roadblock in your life by becoming your new BFF in training. (and here I interrupt this broadcast to ask: Just how many cell phones does Brian have? Every time I look he seems to be using a new one). Only apparently not half as good as the old one. And I don’t for one second believe that Mikey’s tales of Fat Marley ever amused Brian that much. ‘Course, Ted is only really doing it so that he can score with one of Brian’s rejects, as he tells Emmett at the gym, though he is trying for that Nobel Peace Prize while he is at it. I love when Ted gets snarky. He also thinks that Brian just wants someone new to take for granted, considering Mikey is no longer available for that position. That probably is a little closer to the truth than Brian really wanting Ted’s company. * sighs * Emmett turns down a gym trick with really pretty blue eyes, and Ted thinks that maybe there is something in his promise to God after all, and is worried. When Ted and Brian do meet up for drinks at Woody’s, Ted does go home with a rejected trick of Brian’s, because apparently Brian just can’t trick if Mikey isn’t there to watch and be jealous. * rolls eyes * Brian leaves the bar and gets blown, but then is sad because Mikey isn’t in his jeep waiting to drive his drunk ass home. Too bad, so sad. No sympathy from my corner. And adding: Best pick-up line EVER: You help me diversify my portfolio, and I’ll help you diversify yours.
Brian cannot believe it. I want Ted’s accountant ass. SO bad. :)
The lesbian house of love, and Mel and Linds are having problems. Mel is bitter because she never sees her son, due to the long hours that Mel is working and Brian still having his rights to Gus. Also, Lindsay has stopped responding to Mel, both emotionally and physically. Well, Mel was not pleasant in her talk about Linds and Brian’s party. Why should she respond to someone who can say such awful things in public? Mel tries to get Linds to talk, but Linds puts on her WASPy mask and starts talking about dinner.
At Mikey and the doc’s, Mikey is finishing putting up his boxes. He is going to be unpacking he holy terror of all of his collectibles soon. Oh, to see David’s face when that happens. He acts all smooth about it now, but you saw how he reacted to Mieky’s old place. This should be great. Burt first, sex that I can’t talk about because I don’t need to use any more brain bleach than is necessary, kthnx. If only they looked more like they were enjoying it and less like they were having a seriously painful bowel movement, I could. Maybe. But both of them are happy, and that is good.
Next morning that all changes. Mikey is putting his stuff right where he wants, thanks to David’s prompting, and David is less than pleased. He nearly has a heart attack seeing all of Mikey’s comic book paraphernalia all over his house. * laughs * He lies to Michael about it, of course. Mikey buys it. Poor guy. And how did David not know that Mikey didn’t like sports? Isn’t that something that you find out about someone relatively early? And how could he be so dense not to realize that in retail, one doesn’t always have Saturday off? Oh, I sense trouble.
The Lesbian Fun House, and Mel is vacuuming while arguing with Lindsay about seeing a therapist. Another one, because I guess you can never have too many these days. It’s what all the cool kids are doing. Just ask Jen. Linds thinks the only problem is the one that Mel is creating. Somehow I think that was the wrong choice of words, there, but luckily she is saved by the doorbell. Mel answers, Brian makes a lewd joke with a teddy bear (a teddy bear? Is nothing sacred anymore? * cries *), and Mel makes a mean reference to Justin. Grr. Brian wants to see Gus. I note that he is not trying to antagonize for once. Mel says that he is taking a nap. So why the fuck was she vacuuming? Loud noises wake kids up, and Mel would hardly win the Mother of the Year Award for causing the youngun to be fussy. Oh, well. Brian will stay for dinner. Huh? It’s two in the afternoon and he wants to hang. Again, huh? Oh, this is about Michael. Okay, now they get it. Brian pouts and even Mel looks a little sorry for him. Linds says that it’s not too late to fix things, and as Brian retorts that some things are better left broken, the lesbians share a meaningful glance. Then Brian goes off the deep end and mentions playing Scrabble, and the huh? faces go to straight out WTF? faces. And with good reason.
Mikey goes to work, where Fat Marley is reading off this list of how to tell that your hubby is gay. Everyone is laughing, and Mikey is horribly uncomfortable. Tracey sees this, and lights into Fat Marley about it. See? I knew I liked Tracey. Then Tracey gives “Mr. Novotny” her two weeks notice. Mikey feels like a heel, and well he should.
Brian is at Woody’s again, sucking at pool for the first time in his life and once again turning down tricks. Ted shows up to score some more, and does. Gotta love an opportunist. Especially one with corny lines like Ted’s.
Meanwhile Emmett is busy living up the straight life by getting drunk in a gay bar. Admittedly, not a big deal, until you look at the fact that Emmett is probably the biggest queen in the world, and he’s only making himself miserable. A guy name Matt approaches; he’s cute, but his eyes are a little scary. Emmett tells him that he no want sexing up, but Matt says that he isn’t interested. He is from a group called ‘See the Light’; a group where gay folk are turning themselves into straight folk every damn day. Emmett is interested; I want to hurl. Cult, cult cult!
At the diner, Justin’s cute little ass is serving everyone and bussing tables, and the customers appreciate. Oh, do they appreciate. Daph is jealous. She wants to have a cute waiter bum and make enough moolah in tips that she probably never needs to touch her actual paychecks, like Justin. He is so modest about it, too. “I could fuck practically anyone.” Daph echoes my thoughts, twice, first when she asks why he doesn’t and then when she’s all, oh, never mine, Brian’s the reason, and he’s here. And he for some reason wants to talk to Justin. And ask him over? Wha? Justin is all cute and excited until he realizes why. Because he misses Michael. So he does this really cute if overdone sit com move and “accidentally” switches Michael and Brian’s orders, only they catch him on it because it has to be the dumbest move in the history of the world, even if it did work on that episode of Saved by the Bell.
Michael goes home with lemon bars for David only to find that while he was at work, David took down all of his stuff. He even hid Captain Astro in the closet. No one puts Captain Astro in a closet!
At the loft, Brian looks happy for the first time yet. He’s relaxed, he’s smiling, and he’s got Justin on his lap feeding him ice cream. The third explains the other two. There was major squeeage for me here, and not just because the boys are all cute and naked and feeding each other ice cream and holding hands and-! But because this showed me for that Justin was getting to be as important to Brian as Mikey, if in a different way. Considering Justin was the only one that he hung out with who was actually able to make him smile, I say that it is a reasonable conclusion. Then there is the fact that Brian doesn’t even get mopey about Mikey till Justin is the one to bring it up. And then Justin says it. “You must really love him”. We’ll hear this again later, from a different mouth regarding a different person-if I ever get that far in my recaps, that is. :) Brian kicks Justin out, but Justin was expecting this if the way that he gets dressed during his and Brian’s whole conversation about Mikey is any indication. Then he spies Mikey’s comic on the counter and gets a great idea in his little twink brain.
So Emmett goes to the ‘See the Light’ meeting, and thinks that he’s found his answer, even if he does spend the first half of the meeting mocking it. I say again, CULT! One more thing. The leader of the cult, he keeps asking Emmett these questions, like, “do you and your friends spend hours obsessing about your body and the bodies of other men?” or “do your conversations revolve around trivialities, like movie stars?” or “do you find yourselves going home night after night with men whose name’s you don’t even know?” Okay, at least two of those things apply to me, and I am straight. Does that mean that I should ‘See the Light’ and try pussy? I didn’t think so. * rolls eyes for probably the fiftieth time during this sub plot *
At David’s-because that is whose stuff gets to see the outside of the closet, Mikey finally lets him know that he and his stuff come as a packaged deal, and if David cannot accept Captain Astro in his life, then maybe he shouldn’t have moved in. Trouble in paradise already? They are almost as bad as Mel and Linds-who ironically enough, David wanted them to emulate two episodes ago.
Speaking of the not so merry munchers, that is where Brian has been spending all of his time lately. At least, that’s what Mel rants to Ted when she makes him quit diversifying Brian’s rejects’ portfolios so that she can bitch. Lindsay is doing the same with Brian, which is maybe not so good considering he’s half the reason Mel is throwing a shit fit. She mentions this, telling Brian that he should have signed over his rights. I grit my teeth. Fortunately, the conversation moves to Lindsay being a cold, unresponsive bitch. Linds finally admits that the reason she doesn’t talk is because she is afraid that if she does, then she will say something that she’ll regret. Something she can’t take back. Brian thinks that this might be good for her. Ted offers to take Brian to Woody’s, but not for Mel. For his sex life. * giggle *
It’s Tracey’s last day at the Big Q, and she and Mikey finally talk. She tells him that it wouldn’t have mattered to her that he was gay if he had just come out and told her. She just didn’t like being lied to and humiliated. She thought they were friends. Tracey kicks such major ass. She and Mikey work things out, and agree to get coffee sometime.
And with Brian gone, Mel and Linds finally talk. Or rather, Linds blows up and Mel listens, shocked. Hey, she told her to open her mouth.
Emmett is still going through is “I don’t want to be gay” crisis. He’s looking kind of ill. And Ted compares his newfound relationship with Brian to a yellow tick bird and rhinos. Not such a nice comparison, IMO. Emmett tries to get Ted to see the light, but Ted likes his life the way it is. He likes tricking and scooping up Brian’s rejects. So no buddy to see the light with Emmett. Emmett commits fully to seeing the light. * glares *
Finally, Justin puts his plan into action when he tracks Mikey down at-where else?-the comic book shop. He first feeds Michael this line of bullshit about how he asked where to find him and Brian told him that seeing a comic puts the light in Mikey’s eyes. Mikey laps it up eagerly, even though he should know that Brian would never in a million years say anything like that, ever. Unless maybe his dick was in jeopardy. Justin gets Michael to see the truth behind what Brian did. That Brian pushed him away for his own good, and that the Captain Astro comic he gave Mikey was his way of saying goodbye. If I ever had any doubts about my raging Justin lurve, this killed them off. It’s a sweet, selfless gesture of someone who just wants the person that they love to be happy. Mikey could take lessons for later when he has the chance to help out Brian and Justin in the same way and doesn’t take it.
Mikey tracks Brian down at Woody’s, and they make up. Mikey voices his fears about David to Brian and Brian tells him to be patient. David will learn. And he does. When Mkey gets home, Dave has stuck his comic stuff back up and is reading one of his comics. He’s making an effort to try, and Michael appreciates that. Comics turn him on. Don’t ask; it’s safer that way. It looks like things are going to work out after all.
If I have time, later today will see 113. :)